Another one bites the dust!!!

Yes people.... one step closer, one more shot down.

Never the less this semester got a bit more complicated, due to "extraordinary" matters, this semester went form plagiarism, to a lot of debts, to deceit, to getting drunk with some teachers, to screwing things up with a great guy, some friendships weakened, others got stronger; hell it had it all.

And yet I'm not one to complain, but needless to say, it wasn't my favorite, but I learned a lot of life lessons, the kind I love!!

Next semester will get more interesting, I'll become a teachers asis., which will make me furfill my mision in life, and become a total biatch, towards people like "afro[1]".


[1] A little big mouth son of a #/&)!, I'll complement on this in another post.

Monday 4 AM lesson.........

Monday 4 AM lesson

If you have been irresponsible enough to do something quite stupid and idiotic, you must be responsible enough to make amends

You can't put a time stamp on love......

Trying to control love and time, is impossible; people who think that they can control either or worse, BOTH have issues.

I know it would be great if we could decide when, and how long we fall in love, or better yet who we love and put a time stamp that says "in 3 months this will expire"; that would just be great. But things aren't like that, life isn't like that. It would most certainly make life easier. Imagine that, you could say "I'm going to fall out of love of this son of a bitch in 2 weeks". But ohh hell no!!! When the going gets though, your still loving.

Time works the same way.... I learned the worst way, that time isn't a reusable o recyclable resource. You can't control time, you can't waste it, you can't leave things "for tomorrow". We can't leave things like that, tying lose ends, both time and love, we can't leave love for another time, we can't have a feeling and not act on it, that will only lead to self destruction. And I guess that's what's going on with me.... oh well, it's the price I pay, for being me and being stupid. Peace out y'all.

Madonna to Lady Gaga

Madonna: What the hell is a disco stick?

Lady Gaga: You know what it is!!!

To hell with it.....

I'm no longer going to give explinations for not writting frecuently, because it's always the same damn thing.

Moving on, that's the attitude I've been trying to accomplish, but I can't... it's becoming pathetic. I start bulshitting... "ohh hell no, I want nothing to do with him" and 2 seconds later, he has me in the palm of his hand, and he knows it... I've lost my self respect.

It's kind of what out president has done with the Federal Electric Company, by liquidating it, and getting rid of the corrupt unions. But in my case, I can't get rid of my own corruption. All of this under the scheme "it's better to find out, than never know" I've sure as hell done a lot of stupid things, but o well.... at least I know, the problem is that I'm still there waiting.

On the upside, I had a wonderful time last night.... a night full of excess, just the way I like it.

Your Heart....

I carry your heart

I carry your heart with me( I carry it in
my heart)I am never without it (anywhere
I go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear
not fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) I want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)!!!!

-E.E. Cummings-

This morning didn't start out all that well....

The following events ocurred right after the events of last night (since I didn't go partying).

Riiing Riiing Riiing..... 5:30 AM: My 1st thought this morning: "Damn it, I gotta get to my 7 AM class to turn in a paper".... (flashfoward through the morning routine) before I'm out the door, my sister yells at me for a reason as idiotic as her lazy ass"That's why 'he' will never be your boyfriend".
Scene 2.... I get early to school, for the 1st time in this semester. I even run into Veneronni, (puff a wounderful teacher) and we talk about school, academia and my area, he congradulates me for being in political communication. At that point I thought, puff..... what a great way to start my day. HOW VERY WRONG I WAS!!!


Scene 3: I sit outside my classroom on the 3rd floor; and time goes by... 7:15 AM "Hmm no one has gotten to class, how wierd.. I ask Joaquin through sms...." he responds: "the teacher sent an email last night that she won't come to class". DAMN IT!! I walk out the building screaming curse words.


Scene 4, ok I calm down I get to the office and I start working -thinking ok, I'll get a head start-. Scene 5: I had to burn an international advertising festival (we have the original DVDs that the Spanish Embassy lent us) I go to desk were the cds were stored, and what do you know the DVD falls down under the drawer and I spent an hour trying to get the original DVD out. Sudeenly I stik my hand underneath the drawer, and my friggin hand get's stuck. I can't move, my cel is too far to reach.... (funny scene) don't you think. I was a half hour stuck, kicking the hell outta the desk, until I just shut my eyes and pull my hand out (It still hurts).

Scene 5: finnally I start burning the dvds, and while doing so, I went to organize the goddamn newspapers that my boss had left out for me.

Scene 7: I finish my work, my boss comes trought the door with more newspapers. And right now I'm thinking "ohh hell no, I'm not going through the whole newspaper ordeal"

I'M IN DESPERATE NEED OF A DRINK!!!

Damn it.... bright side.

Ugh, I missed a reunion with my highschool budies!! Damn it, I'm quite pissed... this semester had started out wonderful, with great subjects, only the necesary and good friends not more, none the less, good teachers -although I don't agree with them always-, I'm actually learning the Machiavelian theories towards obtaining unlimited power. And today of al days, a teachers asistant today alarmed us all with a heavy homework assingnment for tommorow. So I decided not to go out, and do the responsihing, the thing a true college student would do and sudenly at 8:45 PM, the teachers asis... informed us all: "I won't be going tommorow to pick up your asignments, it's posponed until tuesday".

And yes, It was too late to go out, I didn't have a ride... damn you EVE.... I will get my revenge.

Ohh well, on the bright side: The other day I was thinking, and I learned yet again one more leason. Sometimes in life you expect certain things of people -either positive or negative- and sudenly, you know what will go down, but still; what you predicted happends and you have the "guts" to act surprised. It's sad, sometimes you don't want to be right, but hell if you can't help it what the hell. I still believe some bulshit will end up drowning shitty people and if not, well...... there's always other ways: VENGANCE FILLED WAYS!

So here goes the new motto: "It doesn't come as a suprise to me, what comes as a suprise is that it suprises you. Hell let's not act suprised it's what you were ready for".

pd. As it turnes out, some people involved in the whole "short-pineapple" ordeal I talked about a couple of enteries ago, think they're son snide... and they can get away with anything, but we're always one step ahead of your neurotic-mediocre ass!!!

Lyrics of my life….

Life to me has always been full of mottos and phrases. It just so happens that I have found in some songs the phrases in which I can base my life. I can’t take complete credit for them.

Although I have some originals, they are just phrases, they can’t be made into songs:

• “Love is not forever and not for everyone”

• “Attitude it’s no motto it’s most certainly a way of life… so start living and stop BITCHING!!!”
• “Time… is a resource we don’t have at our disposal, it’s not reusable”
• “When I die, I want to do it with the less regrets possible”
• “Rum and Rock line After Line, till life tears us apart”
• "It's easy to be a communist when you have nothing lose".

Will once told me something that really stuck.

• “So many things to do. Should I run out and do them? Wait are we doing them, now? I might be damned but, I’ll be dammed if I let time win.”

Now, in the musical department I have found a series of songs that come into my head in certain situations, for instance:

• LOVE

When I feel more than enough. I know Taylor Swift is cheesy but o well. "You Belong With Me".

If you could see That I'm the one Who understands you Been here all along So why can't you See you belong with me You belong with me. […] Oh, I remember You driving to my house In the middle of the night I'm the one who makes you laugh When you know you're about to cry And I know your favorite songs And you tell me about your dreams Think I know where you belong Think I know it's with me

On my old crush. PlayradioPlay! “Madi Don’t Leave”

We share conversations on How we're all just floating Through space and nothing matters I'm looking for a pattern […] I've got a hopeless crush Maybe that don't mean much to you But, i'm hoping this can keep going Madi, dear, can't we just disappear And take our chances On a teenagers' romances?

The reasons why I love him so much. Imogen Heap"Goodnight And Go"

Why d'ya have to be so cute? It's impossible to ignore you […] Must you make me laugh so much It's bad enough we get along so well Say goodnight and go […]One of these days, you'll miss your train and come stay with me We'll have drinks and talk about things, any excuse to stay awake with you You'll sleep here, i'll sleep there, but then the heating may be down again at my convenience we'd be good, we'd be great together.

On those priceless moments I have with who I love. Snow Patrol - Crack The Shutters

Crack the shutters open wide, I wanna bathe you in the light of day And just watch you as the rays tangle up around your face and body I could sit for hours finding new ways to be awed each minute Cuz' the daylight seems to want you just as much as I want you It's been minutes, it's been days, it's been all I will remember Happy lost in your hair and the cold side of the pillow Your hills and valleys are mapped by my intrepid fingers And in a naked slumber, I dream all this again

• ROCK IN LIFE

A life lesson: Common People- Pulp

Never live like common people never do what common people do never fail like common people never watch your life .... slide out of view And then dance, and drink, .... and screw because there's nothing else to do I want to live with common people like you.

On those very common and overwhelming moments in my life.

Metric- Help I’m alive.

I tremble They're gonna eat me alive If I stumble They're gonna eat me alive Can you hear my heart beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer Hard to be soft, tough to be tender Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer If you're still alive My regrets are few. If my life is mine, what shouldn't I do? I get wherever I'm going, I get whatever I need while my blood's still flowing and my heart still beats. Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer Hard to be soft, tough to be tender Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer.

When I’m just a tad anxious.
Jane's Addiction - Not an addict Lyrics

Breathe it in and breathe it out And pass it on, it's almost out We're so creative, so much more We're high above but on the floor It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive If you don't have it you're on the other side […]It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive If you don't have it you're on the other side I'm not an addict (maybe that's a lie).

When I’m feeling adventurous and devious: MGMT:Indie Rokkers:

“With my heart still filled with fear and it goes on bleedin […] The clean dreams, the sexy limousine Jason's (?) got the energy he used to be a coke fien the skinny brown arms coming round in your shirt heart is in the right place brain is in the dirt you live life like everyone's an enemy.

When I feel that time is not enough, and I need a lot more. MUSE: Time Is Running Out:

Our time is running out Our time is running out You can't push it underground You can't stop it screaming out I wanted freedom Bound and restricted I tried to give you up But I'm addicted.

And the latest adition, when I feel like biatching around and never getting rid of my partying ways.

Shakira - Loba Lyrics

Sigilosa al pasar [...]
Llevo conmigo un radar especial para localizar solteros
Si acaso me meto en aprietos tambien llevo el número de los bomberos ni tipos muy lindos ni divos ni niños ricos yo se lo que quiero pasarla muy bien y portarme muy mal en los brazos de algún caballero
Una loba en el armario
Tiene ganas de salir
Deja que se coma el barrio Antes de irte a dormir
Cuando son casi la una la loba en celo saluda a la luna
Duda si andar por la calle o entrar en un bar a probar fortuna
Ya está sentada en su mesa y pone la mira en su proxima presa
Pobre del desprevenido que no se esperaba una de esas

Not a Common Person....

After an eventful weekend of making it up to my friends; I can finally write on the subject I promised weeks ago, about the loss in the campaign I "coordinated".

Yes, my 1st "semi" real campaign I lost, but hell I could justify the matter in a zillion ways, but the truth of the matter is: as an adviser you don't have the last word in the choices; hell you get a word which is better than not having one. But that's no guarantee.


I'm more than certain I was right in everything I "advised"; but hell, it wasn't up to me; as it usually isn't. I told the politician not to trust another crazed politician, who has no respect and is infected from "frustration syndrome". But hell, "my boss" made his choice not to listen and to trust someone non worthy of it. That's when the backstabbing shiat went down -something far from common in politics-.

It's sad that our campaign team lost, but in a good way, there's some good in the crappy... hell, maybe people will learn that sometimes a 21 year old can be right (ha). Although, people watch out... I'm not retiring, so let me warn you: politicians beware biatches; because the game isn't over and a scandolous, devious and cynical Machiavellian in search 4 power is waiting (hell, that's me).

Le grand show.... le grand pineapple...

Don't we look like a wonderful and happy team?? Don't cha think?? are you sure... well that's a pineapple.... yeah bitches I soooooo bluffed you all. DON'T BE NIEVE!!

Yes the biggest pineapple of all times..... it all started exactly a week ago, day when the college Rally Expresión en corto began. You see I was under false pretenses.... I though I went to GUANAJUATO to work with "semi professionals" knowing nothing about production, but it all became quite disappointing when people let personal differences interfere with the goal of making a short film in 48 hours.

It all started on the wrong foot when "the boyz", didn't think it was fair for them to wake up early (as we hadn't slept at all).

Then things got really shitty when they bitched all day long..... food, sleep, and shit, ugh I never had to put up with such woses. (and God knows I've known my share) But I didn't give in, hahaha that was the best part. Aside from that, we ended up partying... thank god I met some folks who weren't panties in a bunch like our "director", whom argued "us" being a team that consisted of a table with varios legs.... hahaha since he gave a rats ass what was going on with us, this is the table we imagine he was refering to:
He's the only member of the team... beacuse everyone else "is useless". hahaha.... but we had out revenge, yes folks, we couldn't just bear with the "bulllshiaaat"..... so here goes in a couple of scenes:
1.. the plan....

2. making it happen:

3. made it happen:













4. screw 'em all, and hell we even made new friends:

5. Le grande finale. CUT:





And finally I would really like to thank those who truly made it possible..... Gaby for accidentally coming up with the plan and being convincing, Francis for hiding and thinking it over and aplying the term "piña", the boys: Saul and Chrsitian for suporting us and distracting eveyone while Franz hid.

I have no excuse....

I know I know.... I've been an irresponsible-unforgivable person lately, I haven't updated this thing in almost 2 months. But I haven't been on vacation, therefore can I be forgotten?

But I swear..... I've been hella's busy.... and I promise I will write of my life experiences and learnings once I'm done with this short story for a rally. Wish me luck. And to all of my friends..... sorry I have been a lousy abandoner (how very bitchy of me).

PD... Yeah, my campaign LOST I will tell you all about it later, damn it... but it wasn't my fault I was a wonderful adviser and I was right.... like George Stephanopoulos and Dick Morris with Clinton in the good old days.

ATTENTION: ATTENTION SEEKERS!!

11 things worthy of my attention

Some folks find it “entertaining” acquiring attention from their peers, “asking for it” even “begging for it”. I know I hate many attitudes but acting immature due to a lack of self respect and maturity is right on top of the list and so is the need for others “praise” something despicable. These are the 11 things that I would admire enough to praise and give a person MY attention (and, ha- respect).

1. Pinching Hugh Jackmans’ ass and getting away with it!!
2. Getting the popes hat and putting it on while all eyes are upon you during mass.
3. Winning the presidential race and resigning augmenting “it being a boring ass job”.
4. Flashing an important political or monarchal figure.
5. Bitch-slapping Ana Gabriela Guevara, and running so fast that bitch can’t catch up
6. In a family members wedding, during the “speech” saying inappropriate things such as: “I never thought my sister would find a guy that would want to voluntarily screw her"
7. Getting caught having sex on a historical statute.
8. Going very high to work, with everyone thinking “hmm, that’s not normal behavior” but being powerful enough that no one can do anything about it.
9. Flipping over a car and surviving it –not killing anyone else in the process-, and even laughing about it –extra points if it’s a luxurious car-.
10. Never being accused of being a “bad-load”.
11. Never going to classes and getting a better GPA than people who do go.

Just 2 hours before turning 21

I have just realized what my biggest disadvantage towards life is. I make other peoples problems my own. A big reason to why I blame myself for certain things, ending up feeling guilty for things that are totally out of my control. The same reason why I don't cope like normal people do with certain situations..... it's a flaw I know it.

That's why sometimes I'm self destructive.... that's why I blame my self with the typical "should'a, could'a, would'a" bulshit. Even though it's not my responsibility......

But, hell it's a part of me.

At least I realized this before I turn 21, I can feel more mature now (ha ha ha) ..... now I just have to learn control, and acceptance.

“The use of the truth as a road to responsible political communication”

-----

Living in Raccoon City

I have always suspected that living here was dangerous to my health. But up until Friday it was made official, there is a “terrible” “catastrophic” and “deadly” swine flu going around. Due to this: clubs, bars, private parties etc have been canceled, restaurants are closed, and so are movie theaters, schools sports events and concerts. I believe that these are drastic measures that occur in 3rd world countries –like mine- with governments that don’t know how to get a grip on things. IT SHOULDN'T HAVE COME TO THIS, but since our govenrments are slow, they decided to wait it out!!!

Even the measures that people are taking are mediocre, they don’t even know how to wear their masks, and they are still eating on carts in the streets, I laugh a lot when I go out. I feel like the characters in Resident Evil, everyone is paranoid you can’t even sneeze without people wanting to throw themselves to the ground –as if I had a gun-. I’m not going to be feeding the collective hysterical exaggeration I’m living in. I believe that if people would stop automating and start going to the doctor this wouldn’t spread.

People are starting to suspect of infection their friends and themselves; that’s just downright sad and pathetic; they might as well kill their friends and families and just start biting eachother. And might I clear the air, people are dying, but that’s just because they decide to go to the hospital when they can’t breathe, this resulting in lung failure. You should’ve all just vaccinated when you had a chance, but now you worry!

“Don’t worry I’m infected but I'm not contagious”- Alice

YazzZzz a Machiavellian who is constantly scheming

I have been on spring break in a land far far away, therefore I wasn’t able to write in my blog –yes, I know I’m always justifying my irresponsibility-

I went to this pseudo-virgin beach in a state located very south in Mexico, Oaxaca I was inn island that goes by the name of Chacahua; there’s barely electricity and running water, so you can get my drift.

It was an interesting trip, but, hell I’m a city gall, that likes the commodities of civilization I can’t help it; no one can blame me. I was planning on rockin’ it and I sure as hell did that “Rum, line after line”. But still I came to the next conclusions:

1. I love the big cities, were things aren’t monotonous.
2. Hell, don’t get me wrong I love nature, the nightlights, creeks, lakes, woods; and all that mumbo jumbo, it just doesn’t fill me anymore. I can attribute that to the fact that I lived in the middle of all that for about 11 years, so it no longer surprises me.
3. I believe that vacations are for resting, not for walking miles for rum and cigarrets –hahaha-.

Ok after that intro, I have to continue with the subject I had mentioned the last time. To refresh some memories: In politics, if no one betrays you; you’re not doing good politics. I promise I will never forget this phrase in my pragmatic career.

You see I believe that if you are doing things right, that usually makes some people upset and even envious; those two factors are one of the many sources of treason. They want to jump you, and smile down upon you. I learned that from one of my friends ex-girlfriends who was betrayed by her best friend for a bunch of crumbs of power, which neither did him or her obtain…. That’s a great life lesson.

Now you get why I learn more from everyday life than from a bunch of Marxists books –I’m more frustrated than ever in my terminal option, things are getting worse before they get better-.

campaigning through life.....

Ok, so I have been a negligent bitch, I haven’t written in ages. But I have a wonderful justification towards my actions. I have been working on a campaign, a University Committee campaign; it was kind of a big deal. My department went nuts; dirty campaigns, black campaigns, lies, a bit of the truth, the speeches, debates; the whole ENCHILADA!!

I had a wonderful time, I was in operations. And we won the whole thing –OK, so what! We lost communications- But the Social Science Committee, the University Committee -Prince Hervin-, Political Science, and Public Administration was a total win by our part!!!

And the guy who won Communications is going to have to put up with me and my bullshit –cause I can’t trust his ass-. He’s going to have to work a lot on his proposals because I’m going to hunt his deceitful, two-faced ass.

April, May and June are going to be 3 though months for me… I will be working simultaneously in 2 political campaigns and the polls investigation for the Public Opinion Study Group. And on top of that, my aunt and uncle are coming all the way from Argentina.

Must go, I promise to upload some life living lessons soon, real soon. Here’s an hint:
In politics, if no one betrays you; you’re not doing good politics.

Envy....

In “Game of an Angel”, it’s Spanish author –Carlos Ruiz Zafón- expressed this phrase, which I love:

"Envy is a religion for mediocre people. It’s comforting, it responds to matters that are sprayed inside, and it also rots the soul, it allows a justification for all of the indifference, and cheapness; to the point of belief that those are virtues and that the doors to heaven will only open to unhappy people like them. They go through life without leaving a mark no more than excluding others and making others feel less".

Could it be???

d. IT'S WRITTEN

I think it's not only written, but a day like today 2 years ago.... he was destined, and I wasn't.

Anything can be fixed with a CUBA!!

Well almost anything, as it turns out, as some of my readers know: I have issues with my lil sis, and yesterday I casually had to pick her up at a partaaaay. So I went to get her, alongside with a good friend of mine, and suddenly we ended up going to another party, in which my sister socialized, and she finally speaks to me again!! Since she has been pissed at me for a month, and I never completley understood why! hahaha.


I spent a wonderful saturday, alongside with a couple of highschool friends, and some great Havanna Club and Jack Daniel's!! hahaha

Can you believe it?? All thanks to serving her a couple of drinks! hahahaha

PD Well I must get back to the red carpet, I loved the way Brad Pitt dodged Ryan Secrest- an annoying lil prick-. Cuz I'm like that! hahah Untile next time!!!

Educational Crisis

Inspite current events, when everyone is talking about: economics, crisis, poverty, unemployment I can only think of my crisis the one college has begun to put me in a dilemma. I must be honest, I’m in desperate need of some input on the subject…

Here you see, the thing goes like so… I thought, in my bliss ignorance, that in college I would learn it all, everything I need to succeed and become what I want to, learn those little things, those details you need to know to work in this business. U

But the thing is, I let myself become convinced of that, I was stuck in my own fixated reality. And actually things aren’t what I thought, you see, I think that I’m not learning what I should be learning, and I’m actually going through the motions at school. Most of my teachers are Marxists’ that don’t see more than what they want to. Sooo after a tough ass exam I got in, and I was happy as hell, though a bit unsure that I had made the right "career" choice... still wanting to become a lawyer

On Tuesday (2 weeks ago), speaking with my high school principal –a genius, I might add- a guy who can rationalize and make my college teachers look like ignorant wimps with false arguments. You see talking to him, I realized that I learn more talking to a guy like him, than talking to 99.9999% of the teachers I’ve had classes with – with the exception of Tenorio of course-.

This dilemma, started off on Tuesday, reading a whole lot of things on the Obama Campaign, I almost had a heart attack, when I saw that Jon Favreau -the guy who wrote Obama’s speeches- is only 27 years old, and of course his P.A is only 24. Daaang…. That’s do a whole lot, in a young age! Imagine that, a 24 year old, with the prez’s agenda!!! Why can’t people have that kind of opportunities in this country “in development”.

Is it worth it to be almost 5 years studying this, when I’m clearly seeing that I’m not learning enough? I mean, hell, don’t think I’m slaking off… I’m doing a whole lot by myself, besides reading actually good books. But should I stay or should I go? Is the paper that worth it. I thought that going into my option I would be happy, and it's be a terrible week, things are officially worse than ever!! What to do?? Should I just go through with it?? Should I stay or should I go? I want to specialize on political marketing, media training, and crisis.... and I'm sure as hell not getting any of that with all the Marxists theoreicals my college makes me lear and bullshit around!!

The stoooory of my life!!

I felt inspired with this song, call it projection.... or whatever........

Sweetness, sweetness never suits me, when I get up to take you home
Maybe it's love, love at first slightly drunk
Now I'm walking with the sun in my mouth

Worry, worry is a well, going to let it fall tonight, from where we stand

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
I can see what's coming, but I'm not saying it

Sickness, weakness at the thought, of how you're going to play
How long should I stay?
Promises, promises never cease to assist it, now I'm back on my back
Please bite your words
Hurry, hurry to believe, I can always trust, as much as you deceive

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
I can see what's coming, but I'm not saying it

What's your middle name? How do you play the game?
I'll be the first to leave
When did I grow up? I don't want to say too much
I'll be the first to leave

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
What can't be decided
Can fool you into thinking maybe you can choose

I can see what's coming
But I'm not saying it

Stars- Midnight Coward.....because after all we've been through... you are just another coward!!!

Goood ol' Ferras...

The less we have to lose the less we care! Fear those whom have nothing to lose in this life!!

That’s the leason which the “good old ‘Ferras’” made me learn. Who is he? What did he do? The story is quite Mexican, although… I will try to translate the good juicy details…

Here’s the scene, so you can feel the ambient: A guy is standing in the line up –the one where the cops take pictures- Like so…. - Yes, just like the d12 poster-.

A "sly" reporter -like most of the reporters in this land- hahaha- goes up to Ferras… and he immediately starts of telling “his facts”, throught a story with no chronological order o sense - in that matter-.

“My name is Felipe Ferras Goméz, sir. I’m from Veracruz. The dude came up to me with a chain and 500 pesos. He told me “I don’t give a fuck what you do, to me your just a shitface”. I told my mother “I’m going to stab that motherfucker”. My mother said “Nooo Ferraz don’t beee maaad, calm down”. Ugh, my damn knees hurt like crazy.

The reporter asks : Did you kill him?

Ferras: Afirmative.

Reporter: What happened?

Ferras: We went to the train tracks, and there he tried to stab me… I avoided them “saa saaa saaa”. The mother fucker… got pissed, but started running. That’s when everything went to hell, and then I threw cold bullets. You know cold bullets. He screamed… “Ferras, stop”. Hell no, you drink it or you spill it!!

Reporter: Where did you meet him?

Ferras: Pancho Viejo, Vercruz The mo fo, was arrested in Veracruz.

Reporter: Why were you arrested?

Ferras: We worked together. The files are there, you can check the computer… Ok, umm domicile robbery. I already paid that. Now all I owe is for him. He said he was going to fornicate with my sister and my mother! When I started shooting he was all up like “nooo stop, I’m sorry”. I can’t deny it… I did it… he’s going to say I did it "ohh he stabbed me” I don’t regret it, damn fag! I did it I’ll pay… I don’t have anywhere to go. I’m 24, Ill be out in 30, I’ll be 54, no problem I’ll pay!! He can’t talk about my mother. My name Is Ferrras. I send a shout out, to Jannet Guadalupe Contreras, alias la mimosa. Who works in a radio station, in Radio Rolas.

END OF STORY

Damn I feel kind of bad for the guy’s lawyer. He was probably screaming: “Shut up”. “Don’t say a single thing”. Ferras is the clear example, that cynicism exists sometimes far more than we would like it to.
Hell, I love cynicism, I'm one of the biggest cynics I know -haha- But hey, there's a limit between saying what you feel like because you know that nothing can come of it, and saying things... that do have consequences -more than just pissing someone off-.such as loosing your freedom. Most of the things we do, we do them because we can, and we feel like doing them. Therefor, this guy should have kept his mouth shut, and hell, he could've argued "self-defense-.

One of many things I believe....

I believe, one of many things in this life: the best things in life, are the ones which... we don't reason upon. We just act on them with out thinking. Hey, don't get me wrong I don't think we are irrational creatures which live upon their feelings. But I do think that it is the reason, that sometimes drives us over the edge. In the end, what I'm saying is that the best moments in life, are the ones which we don't plan, they are the ones that just come out of spontaneity.

For example; in a simple shallow kind of way (my way)... the best parties in life AREN'T PLANNED! I can't help mentioning thaaaa parties, it's just my thing.

But looking at it in a deeper spectrum... those people whom we love, passionated, we don't reason it. For example I could have a long list of demands for a "perfect guy", but in the long run... I end up with the least "list filling" kind of guy. Why?? Because my list is rational... I know why I want a kind of guy that.... 1... 2....3....4... BUT in the end of the road, maybe that guy won't make me feel more than "a simple feeling", and a simple feeling is easy to come by!! And human beeings throught life, don't search for simple feelings; we search for that feeling we can't understand, the feeling that confuses us, the feeling which we can't understand, much less explain.

This is the reason why movies, tv shows, books, and all the rest of the media contains... exist. They produce feelings more than thoughts... you feel something about the character, the news, and then you may rationalize upon it. Or al least, that's my belief!! We search for the feelings that certain things produce. WE ARE IN CONSTANT SEARCH OF EMOTIONS and FEELINGS!!!

I must remind you all, that I always speak for my self.... and for my self ONLY... I would not change any moment that I didn't think...in spite of the consequences -good or bad-. Why??? because... some emotions are worth living for!!! The adrenaline, fear, hatred, incompetence, love, regret. It is more through emotions how we learn. We don't want to feel something again or maybe we do!! hahah... who knows!!

I believe that it is those people who rationalize every movement... who have everything planned out, are the ones who in the end, become most frustrated... because... THINGS DON'T ALWAYS TURN OUT AS THEY SHOULD, or at least, the way some people plan things. There's nothing more unfair than the ways of the world.

I procrastinate way too much, I hate thinking.... that's why weed doesn't go with me!! hahaha

ROCKANDROLLA- movie

A long time ago when I had my 2MB connexion I downloaded a ton of movies.... one of them was ROCKANDROLLA, yeah you know that Guy Richie flick. I must admit I didn't really like Snatch that much, and I'm not fond of Guy, but I enjoyed this movie. It has a great scenry, good actors, a wonderful script... but above everything else, it's got some ass kicking phrases, or as I like to call them, LIFE MOTTOS! haha


The intro, after the credits there's the phrase:
"People ask the question... what's a RocknRolla? And I tell 'em - it's not about drugs, drums, and hospital drips, oh no. There's more there than that, my friend. We all like a bit of the good life - some the money, some the drugs, other the sex game, the glamour, or the fame. But a RocknRolla, oh, he's different. Why? Because a real RocknRolla wants the fucking lot".

Ok the other scene I loved, and not because of the mottos, but because of the direction.... would be the dance scene with Gerard Butler & Thandie Newton. The song which goes perfectly is by Flash & The Plan, and it's called: Waiting for a train.

And last but not least, and for that reason no less importaint; is my favorite part of the whole movie. Why? The answer is quite simple, because one day, I hope not very far away I wish I get the chance to slap someone silly, with a good old fashioned Archie Slap:

hahaha: "There's no need for strong violence".

Wierd couple of days

OK Go!!
These have been a couple of interesting days, up until today. As it turns out I got offered a job… yes… another job.
On Monday I went to the interview and everything, I could have gotten it, but I refused it.

It would have been quite complicated to fit everything in, 2 jobs, school, and partaaays. As I have previously have repeated “I like my comfortable life”. And as my father put it “it’s a big sacrifice, is it worth it? Is it necessary?” Turns out he’s right –something that he hasn’t been for a long time-. Besides, the job had nothing to do with my major.

Even though I bitch a lot about my job at college, I actually enjoy it there, the perks are great, it’s simple, clean cut, and the commodities are good too. –This is how I convince myself-.

On Monday I also went to see a friend, who used to work in county. He asked me to help him pimp out a magazine that he’s sort of running. So I got to thinking, and got the “gang” together on Tuesday – Fer, Cora and Mimmie-, so we started brainstorming, and we will make this zine ours biatches!! It’s a good way to start a year don’t cha think?

Ughh, on the other hand I don't get men. The story of my life: there's this guy and we really hit it off, but no one acts upon their feelings DAMN IT!!!

PD. Yeaah I’m quite exited, because in exactly 6 days Obama will become president. He will sit in his desk in the oval office with his feet placed upon it; and say “Daaamn, I’m one smart negro. Ohhh Now I see how Monica got under the desk, it’s quite spacious.”

The American Dream, thanks to bad advice

A long year in deed!!

2008.... was a year full of a lot of things.... new findings, resignations, fun, a little bit of everything. As I rang in 09 with some cuba libres ,Osvaldinho, his family and my sister I realized I wasted some of my time in things that I shouldn't have, or that weren't worthwhile. Therefore, I'm not going to make a new years resolution about "quitting smoking, loosing weight, stop procrastinating", I'm going to make one that will help me a whole lot more in the future.

My new year resolution will consist of not wasting my time, I will be a whole lot productive; there's nothing worse than throwing away my time, and life for that matter. I learned right up till the end that I had abandoned good people, people who are worth it, and I had focused my attention to a certain person that will never be, a person not willing to make a choice, therefore I made it for him.


I'm going to do all the things that I should have done2 years ago. And that's about it folks. I wish that everyone has a wonderful 09, I wish that the best of 08 is the worse of 08 (just like a good friend told me on new years eve).

This starts now..... c-ya!!!