Honesty Flick...

Yesterday I went to see Dan in Real Life -a great movie by the way-. And taking into consideration a certain crush, with a certain guy-friend. The film made me reflect... a little about honesty.
Honesty is a bitch to some and to others it's everything, although not everyone can be honest about things, and better yet not everyone can accept honesty. Usually people who prefer avoiding the truth aren't people I like being around, I don't know it's a thing of mine... I can't stand having to keep my lips closed, I have a thing for speaking my mind, and even if it gets me in trouble it still most gratifying because "Damn, I said what I thought"; that's my ideal "and ideals are bullet proof".
But the thing is, What happens when you can't be sincere, when you realize that your honesty (as great and true as it it) it might just badly hurt someone in the process. Where must the line be drawn? Is it selfish to speak your mind in these situations?
But what if, just what if you speak your mind to avoid hurting the other person, but the other person, due to certain maturity issues can't cope with it? In that case is it the sincere persons problem? Or is it the individual who can't deal with it's problem? Who's to blame? Is it too selfish and morbid to be honest just to feel better?
What percentage of people truly show appreciation for honesty? I know I do, I prefer to be destroyed with the truth, than to be deceiving with me. I know it's just terribly wrong to wish and expect everyone to be like that. O well, I just had to get that off my chest.

An eventful Friday.

Agh, I’m going mad, the new friggin’ neighbor up in 502, is doing some renovating in her department. I can’t sleep, I got home a few hours ago, and I’m hung-over with head pain, my ribs hurt, I have an unsatisfying thirst, chest pain; but on the bright side, I’m inspired…

It’s official… Under any circumstance I can´t be trusted. I can’t control myself, goddamn it. What are you going to think about a nearly 20 year old, who doesn’t know what self control is? It’s quite weak and the fact of the matter is that I’m really weak.

You’re probably thinking?? Damn, who did she kill? Well that’s the worst part; my actions didn’t affect anyone else but me (well maybe I sort of screwed up the night of a couple of friends, but nothing too serious, I think). I should’ve gone home when I had a chance, I shouldn’t have stayed there. So many should’ves, it is really quite a pity (haha note the rhyme). I’m starting to think that I should stop partying all together, since dear old “mature” Yazzz can’t put a restraint on her self. I’m not going into the “grouse” details.

The worse thing is, that I really got home after all the detours, but noooo… that wasn’t enough… I had to go on and on, and get even more screwed up. I know that if I continue this path, it’s not going to lead to anywhere beneficial. I really have to stop this, even if it means no more partying. I have to learn to have fun without the festivities.

Just Another Day

Soon I’ll be 20 years old and no longer a teen, I’d have lived 20 wonderful summers and winters, accompanied by old friendships, new ones, family, music, excess, and of course a whole lot of attitude. I really don’t want to turn twenty; it’s going to make me feel things I don’t want: old, mature, experimented etc.

Today was actually one of those days, when good things happened. Remember the teacher I really bitched about the other day? You know the fascist, well, it turns out, I’m not half bad writing in Spanish, according to her, she’s a bit variable and unstable, she really needs to make up her mind, do I suck, or don’t I?

In either case, I wasn’t present when she said she loved my critical review, since I had gone for coffee, to study for the Public Opinion and Propaganda exam (yes, I now I said I wouldn’t), but I can’t afford to fuck up in that class.

By the way, hahaha, yesterday I took the “Complete control of English Exam” I laughed right through it, it’s quite pathetic and disturbing: “the best and most prestigious college in Latin America” could perform an exam like that, it was designed for total and complete incompetents. I snickered so hard, the examinee threatened to have me expelled or suspended from the UNAM based on the 87^th article in the organic college law, due to inappropriate behavior, I didn’t want to argue, but it was still quite funny.