juuuuayyy....

Why is it when everything is going to hell, when a lot of things are screwed over, you show up in that precise moment, are willing to listen to me, to tell me I'm right, and to even make jokes on how right I am??

That's another reason why I love you even more, it doesn't matter if it's 3 AM on a Tuesday, you listen and comfort me. You are the voice of reason when everything is just a pile of idiotic crap. I know you have done your fare share of things that have hurt me, I know I gave you power over me, I know I have also hurt you. But in the end, it doesn't matter how far you are, the time of day, you are always there, you have always been there.

You want to help humanity, you want to get rid of the crazies and the dumb, you show me how right I am. I know I can't expect things from people who don't seem to deserve it, but the fact that your voice soothes me, is worth it all the way.

---- to be continued------

Things keep moving....

It's been a while, I'm thinking of shutting down this blog because, well I don't write in it as much. I've used it to vent a lot, but now.... I just don't see the point. Ohh well, let's see, I decided not to write in February (for the most part) because, the month sucks, but now that we're in March I can do so.

Several important things have happened. First and foremost... my high school mentor died, and I was here, once again not being able to go to the service (it just brings back memories of me not being able to say goodbye). I can honestly say, that a lot is lost without him.... he was a wonderful, talented man.

On a better note, things are good here, I like it, I don't lie I do miss my life in Mexico, specially the good people in my life there. Here it's ok, but it's never the same. I talk to my friends back home as much as I can, but it's never the same. I was able to see Robyn LIVE!!! That was a wonderful experience, since I'm not going to Coachella.

The NYC plan is on, we just have to figure out where we're going to live for 15 days!!! (I'm looking forward to reuniting with the tripod... May 20th in the airport, it's going to be crazy).

On a better note, I'm better now, I've been moving on from... "my postmodern" relationship... I'm not as intense about things with him as I was when I got here, I'm starting to forgive myself for my stupidity. That's a good thing. I know it seems like I always talk about him, but he's an important part of my life that I can't ignore and let go just like that.

I do good in school, I find it easier than back home. I have good times and drinking freenzys what more can I ask for.....

Till the next time.

Angry people do stupid things

Well, I've been living here for a month now, it's great. I have a good time, I'm getting my dissertation done and going to class. I get to talk to my friends almost everyday. New York is closer by the minuet. I have a wonderful roommate.

I do like US college life, even if it's in a small town. It's quite nice, good installations, lots of activities (yes, by that I mean parties). I could seriously get use to this. I know I will hate going back to "my home country". But ohh well, that's the way life is.

On the other hand, things didn't end good at all with a guy, and I must confess that I have been angry with him and with myself since I got here. No one had to prove anything to anyone but he decided to prove something, and he sure as hell did it!! And now, we don't speak, and I'm pissed as hell. And that's when anger makes me do stupid things that only screw me over, no one else but me. It's really pathetic that out of anger I screw myself over, and more so when it's due to my anger to a guy who's having the time of his life.

I really must get that part of my life in order.

And I insist, February even though it's only 28 days long, it manages to be the crappiest month eveeer. Every crappy thing in my life has happened in February. A bad thing you name it, February.... so I'm not a fan of this month. I just hope no more bad news comes my way!!

Well, enough procrastinating for one day!! It is Super Bowl Weekend, and the PACKS are up for the title so I must get to it.

Career Move..... Crisis Managment!

One of the best teachers I’ve ever had throughout my college career once wisely said: “If you are ever going to do something illegal never admit it. If you say you’re going to do something illegal, you must deny it, if you are stupid enough to right it down, you must deny it, but even worse, if you are incredibly stupid enough to write it down, and sign it…..DENY IT UNTIL YOU DIE!!!"

I have never been one to deny things, but….. There are certain “special circumstances”.

I must admit, I’m quote surprised that a certain event has just had its three year anniversary, and things are looking up, I didn’t get all pitiable and pathetic.

Nice Hangover Sunday y’all.

I love being cryptic.....

Cryptic and non specific is something I enjoy specially when it's about the "uncomfortable flourecent-pink elephant" in the room, that takes up space but no one wants to discuss and deal with it.

"It is what it has always been, it will always be, and I can't help it....."

I bet no one can interpret the true meaning of that!!!!

everything we do is to avoid the inevitable....

Last Monday, I was at Wendy's enjoying my double bacon-cheeseburger, and talking to a couple of friends, a very adept friend told us "everything we do is to avoid death, from eating to sleeping" and I added "we live trying to avoid death, but it's the only thing that's written since the moment we are born".

It's true, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy our time here..... and there's definitely nothing better to enjoy our time being intoxicated with happiness.

And on Thursday, talking to another friend we concluded that some of us live daring death, and we might just be the last ones to leave!! That's how ironic life can be, and that's precisely whats to love about it.

But what's more ironic??? Living it to avoid it??? or Living it daring it???

By the way, after almost 22 years, I have found my true calling: teaching lessons to all those ignorant cowards, who think they are all that and more. My job is to show them "ohh contraire my friend" hahaha.

And just to avoid all my "lemas", I must add, that I'm almost done paying my dues!!! Let that be a lesson to all: when you need the money, you work your ass off for it, you can't wait for it to land from some airplane full of cash.

Another one bites the dust!!!

Yes people.... one step closer, one more shot down.

Never the less this semester got a bit more complicated, due to "extraordinary" matters, this semester went form plagiarism, to a lot of debts, to deceit, to getting drunk with some teachers, to screwing things up with a great guy, some friendships weakened, others got stronger; hell it had it all.

And yet I'm not one to complain, but needless to say, it wasn't my favorite, but I learned a lot of life lessons, the kind I love!!

Next semester will get more interesting, I'll become a teachers asis., which will make me furfill my mision in life, and become a total biatch, towards people like "afro[1]".


[1] A little big mouth son of a #/&)!, I'll complement on this in another post.

Monday 4 AM lesson.........

Monday 4 AM lesson

If you have been irresponsible enough to do something quite stupid and idiotic, you must be responsible enough to make amends

Madonna to Lady Gaga

Madonna: What the hell is a disco stick?

Lady Gaga: You know what it is!!!

To hell with it.....

I'm no longer going to give explinations for not writting frecuently, because it's always the same damn thing.

Moving on, that's the attitude I've been trying to accomplish, but I can't... it's becoming pathetic. I start bulshitting... "ohh hell no, I want nothing to do with him" and 2 seconds later, he has me in the palm of his hand, and he knows it... I've lost my self respect.

It's kind of what out president has done with the Federal Electric Company, by liquidating it, and getting rid of the corrupt unions. But in my case, I can't get rid of my own corruption. All of this under the scheme "it's better to find out, than never know" I've sure as hell done a lot of stupid things, but o well.... at least I know, the problem is that I'm still there waiting.

On the upside, I had a wonderful time last night.... a night full of excess, just the way I like it.

This morning didn't start out all that well....

The following events ocurred right after the events of last night (since I didn't go partying).

Riiing Riiing Riiing..... 5:30 AM: My 1st thought this morning: "Damn it, I gotta get to my 7 AM class to turn in a paper".... (flashfoward through the morning routine) before I'm out the door, my sister yells at me for a reason as idiotic as her lazy ass"That's why 'he' will never be your boyfriend".
Scene 2.... I get early to school, for the 1st time in this semester. I even run into Veneronni, (puff a wounderful teacher) and we talk about school, academia and my area, he congradulates me for being in political communication. At that point I thought, puff..... what a great way to start my day. HOW VERY WRONG I WAS!!!


Scene 3: I sit outside my classroom on the 3rd floor; and time goes by... 7:15 AM "Hmm no one has gotten to class, how wierd.. I ask Joaquin through sms...." he responds: "the teacher sent an email last night that she won't come to class". DAMN IT!! I walk out the building screaming curse words.


Scene 4, ok I calm down I get to the office and I start working -thinking ok, I'll get a head start-. Scene 5: I had to burn an international advertising festival (we have the original DVDs that the Spanish Embassy lent us) I go to desk were the cds were stored, and what do you know the DVD falls down under the drawer and I spent an hour trying to get the original DVD out. Sudeenly I stik my hand underneath the drawer, and my friggin hand get's stuck. I can't move, my cel is too far to reach.... (funny scene) don't you think. I was a half hour stuck, kicking the hell outta the desk, until I just shut my eyes and pull my hand out (It still hurts).

Scene 5: finnally I start burning the dvds, and while doing so, I went to organize the goddamn newspapers that my boss had left out for me.

Scene 7: I finish my work, my boss comes trought the door with more newspapers. And right now I'm thinking "ohh hell no, I'm not going through the whole newspaper ordeal"

I'M IN DESPERATE NEED OF A DRINK!!!

Damn it.... bright side.

Ugh, I missed a reunion with my highschool budies!! Damn it, I'm quite pissed... this semester had started out wonderful, with great subjects, only the necesary and good friends not more, none the less, good teachers -although I don't agree with them always-, I'm actually learning the Machiavelian theories towards obtaining unlimited power. And today of al days, a teachers asistant today alarmed us all with a heavy homework assingnment for tommorow. So I decided not to go out, and do the responsihing, the thing a true college student would do and sudenly at 8:45 PM, the teachers asis... informed us all: "I won't be going tommorow to pick up your asignments, it's posponed until tuesday".

And yes, It was too late to go out, I didn't have a ride... damn you EVE.... I will get my revenge.

Ohh well, on the bright side: The other day I was thinking, and I learned yet again one more leason. Sometimes in life you expect certain things of people -either positive or negative- and sudenly, you know what will go down, but still; what you predicted happends and you have the "guts" to act surprised. It's sad, sometimes you don't want to be right, but hell if you can't help it what the hell. I still believe some bulshit will end up drowning shitty people and if not, well...... there's always other ways: VENGANCE FILLED WAYS!

So here goes the new motto: "It doesn't come as a suprise to me, what comes as a suprise is that it suprises you. Hell let's not act suprised it's what you were ready for".

pd. As it turnes out, some people involved in the whole "short-pineapple" ordeal I talked about a couple of enteries ago, think they're son snide... and they can get away with anything, but we're always one step ahead of your neurotic-mediocre ass!!!

Lyrics of my life….

Life to me has always been full of mottos and phrases. It just so happens that I have found in some songs the phrases in which I can base my life. I can’t take complete credit for them.

Although I have some originals, they are just phrases, they can’t be made into songs:

• “Love is not forever and not for everyone”

• “Attitude it’s no motto it’s most certainly a way of life… so start living and stop BITCHING!!!”
• “Time… is a resource we don’t have at our disposal, it’s not reusable”
• “When I die, I want to do it with the less regrets possible”
• “Rum and Rock line After Line, till life tears us apart”
• "It's easy to be a communist when you have nothing lose".

Will once told me something that really stuck.

• “So many things to do. Should I run out and do them? Wait are we doing them, now? I might be damned but, I’ll be dammed if I let time win.”

Now, in the musical department I have found a series of songs that come into my head in certain situations, for instance:

• LOVE

When I feel more than enough. I know Taylor Swift is cheesy but o well. "You Belong With Me".

If you could see That I'm the one Who understands you Been here all along So why can't you See you belong with me You belong with me. […] Oh, I remember You driving to my house In the middle of the night I'm the one who makes you laugh When you know you're about to cry And I know your favorite songs And you tell me about your dreams Think I know where you belong Think I know it's with me

On my old crush. PlayradioPlay! “Madi Don’t Leave”

We share conversations on How we're all just floating Through space and nothing matters I'm looking for a pattern […] I've got a hopeless crush Maybe that don't mean much to you But, i'm hoping this can keep going Madi, dear, can't we just disappear And take our chances On a teenagers' romances?

The reasons why I love him so much. Imogen Heap"Goodnight And Go"

Why d'ya have to be so cute? It's impossible to ignore you […] Must you make me laugh so much It's bad enough we get along so well Say goodnight and go […]One of these days, you'll miss your train and come stay with me We'll have drinks and talk about things, any excuse to stay awake with you You'll sleep here, i'll sleep there, but then the heating may be down again at my convenience we'd be good, we'd be great together.

On those priceless moments I have with who I love. Snow Patrol - Crack The Shutters

Crack the shutters open wide, I wanna bathe you in the light of day And just watch you as the rays tangle up around your face and body I could sit for hours finding new ways to be awed each minute Cuz' the daylight seems to want you just as much as I want you It's been minutes, it's been days, it's been all I will remember Happy lost in your hair and the cold side of the pillow Your hills and valleys are mapped by my intrepid fingers And in a naked slumber, I dream all this again

• ROCK IN LIFE

A life lesson: Common People- Pulp

Never live like common people never do what common people do never fail like common people never watch your life .... slide out of view And then dance, and drink, .... and screw because there's nothing else to do I want to live with common people like you.

On those very common and overwhelming moments in my life.

Metric- Help I’m alive.

I tremble They're gonna eat me alive If I stumble They're gonna eat me alive Can you hear my heart beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer Hard to be soft, tough to be tender Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer If you're still alive My regrets are few. If my life is mine, what shouldn't I do? I get wherever I'm going, I get whatever I need while my blood's still flowing and my heart still beats. Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer Hard to be soft, tough to be tender Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer.

When I’m just a tad anxious.
Jane's Addiction - Not an addict Lyrics

Breathe it in and breathe it out And pass it on, it's almost out We're so creative, so much more We're high above but on the floor It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive If you don't have it you're on the other side […]It's not a habit, it's cool, I feel alive If you don't have it you're on the other side I'm not an addict (maybe that's a lie).

When I’m feeling adventurous and devious: MGMT:Indie Rokkers:

“With my heart still filled with fear and it goes on bleedin […] The clean dreams, the sexy limousine Jason's (?) got the energy he used to be a coke fien the skinny brown arms coming round in your shirt heart is in the right place brain is in the dirt you live life like everyone's an enemy.

When I feel that time is not enough, and I need a lot more. MUSE: Time Is Running Out:

Our time is running out Our time is running out You can't push it underground You can't stop it screaming out I wanted freedom Bound and restricted I tried to give you up But I'm addicted.

And the latest adition, when I feel like biatching around and never getting rid of my partying ways.

Shakira - Loba Lyrics

Sigilosa al pasar [...]
Llevo conmigo un radar especial para localizar solteros
Si acaso me meto en aprietos tambien llevo el número de los bomberos ni tipos muy lindos ni divos ni niños ricos yo se lo que quiero pasarla muy bien y portarme muy mal en los brazos de algún caballero
Una loba en el armario
Tiene ganas de salir
Deja que se coma el barrio Antes de irte a dormir
Cuando son casi la una la loba en celo saluda a la luna
Duda si andar por la calle o entrar en un bar a probar fortuna
Ya está sentada en su mesa y pone la mira en su proxima presa
Pobre del desprevenido que no se esperaba una de esas

Not a Common Person....

After an eventful weekend of making it up to my friends; I can finally write on the subject I promised weeks ago, about the loss in the campaign I "coordinated".

Yes, my 1st "semi" real campaign I lost, but hell I could justify the matter in a zillion ways, but the truth of the matter is: as an adviser you don't have the last word in the choices; hell you get a word which is better than not having one. But that's no guarantee.


I'm more than certain I was right in everything I "advised"; but hell, it wasn't up to me; as it usually isn't. I told the politician not to trust another crazed politician, who has no respect and is infected from "frustration syndrome". But hell, "my boss" made his choice not to listen and to trust someone non worthy of it. That's when the backstabbing shiat went down -something far from common in politics-.

It's sad that our campaign team lost, but in a good way, there's some good in the crappy... hell, maybe people will learn that sometimes a 21 year old can be right (ha). Although, people watch out... I'm not retiring, so let me warn you: politicians beware biatches; because the game isn't over and a scandolous, devious and cynical Machiavellian in search 4 power is waiting (hell, that's me).

Le grand show.... le grand pineapple...

Don't we look like a wonderful and happy team?? Don't cha think?? are you sure... well that's a pineapple.... yeah bitches I soooooo bluffed you all. DON'T BE NIEVE!!

Yes the biggest pineapple of all times..... it all started exactly a week ago, day when the college Rally Expresión en corto began. You see I was under false pretenses.... I though I went to GUANAJUATO to work with "semi professionals" knowing nothing about production, but it all became quite disappointing when people let personal differences interfere with the goal of making a short film in 48 hours.

It all started on the wrong foot when "the boyz", didn't think it was fair for them to wake up early (as we hadn't slept at all).

Then things got really shitty when they bitched all day long..... food, sleep, and shit, ugh I never had to put up with such woses. (and God knows I've known my share) But I didn't give in, hahaha that was the best part. Aside from that, we ended up partying... thank god I met some folks who weren't panties in a bunch like our "director", whom argued "us" being a team that consisted of a table with varios legs.... hahaha since he gave a rats ass what was going on with us, this is the table we imagine he was refering to:
He's the only member of the team... beacuse everyone else "is useless". hahaha.... but we had out revenge, yes folks, we couldn't just bear with the "bulllshiaaat"..... so here goes in a couple of scenes:
1.. the plan....

2. making it happen:

3. made it happen:













4. screw 'em all, and hell we even made new friends:

5. Le grande finale. CUT:





And finally I would really like to thank those who truly made it possible..... Gaby for accidentally coming up with the plan and being convincing, Francis for hiding and thinking it over and aplying the term "piña", the boys: Saul and Chrsitian for suporting us and distracting eveyone while Franz hid.

ATTENTION: ATTENTION SEEKERS!!

11 things worthy of my attention

Some folks find it “entertaining” acquiring attention from their peers, “asking for it” even “begging for it”. I know I hate many attitudes but acting immature due to a lack of self respect and maturity is right on top of the list and so is the need for others “praise” something despicable. These are the 11 things that I would admire enough to praise and give a person MY attention (and, ha- respect).

1. Pinching Hugh Jackmans’ ass and getting away with it!!
2. Getting the popes hat and putting it on while all eyes are upon you during mass.
3. Winning the presidential race and resigning augmenting “it being a boring ass job”.
4. Flashing an important political or monarchal figure.
5. Bitch-slapping Ana Gabriela Guevara, and running so fast that bitch can’t catch up
6. In a family members wedding, during the “speech” saying inappropriate things such as: “I never thought my sister would find a guy that would want to voluntarily screw her"
7. Getting caught having sex on a historical statute.
8. Going very high to work, with everyone thinking “hmm, that’s not normal behavior” but being powerful enough that no one can do anything about it.
9. Flipping over a car and surviving it –not killing anyone else in the process-, and even laughing about it –extra points if it’s a luxurious car-.
10. Never being accused of being a “bad-load”.
11. Never going to classes and getting a better GPA than people who do go.

Just 2 hours before turning 21

I have just realized what my biggest disadvantage towards life is. I make other peoples problems my own. A big reason to why I blame myself for certain things, ending up feeling guilty for things that are totally out of my control. The same reason why I don't cope like normal people do with certain situations..... it's a flaw I know it.

That's why sometimes I'm self destructive.... that's why I blame my self with the typical "should'a, could'a, would'a" bulshit. Even though it's not my responsibility......

But, hell it's a part of me.

At least I realized this before I turn 21, I can feel more mature now (ha ha ha) ..... now I just have to learn control, and acceptance.

Envy....

In “Game of an Angel”, it’s Spanish author –Carlos Ruiz Zafón- expressed this phrase, which I love:

"Envy is a religion for mediocre people. It’s comforting, it responds to matters that are sprayed inside, and it also rots the soul, it allows a justification for all of the indifference, and cheapness; to the point of belief that those are virtues and that the doors to heaven will only open to unhappy people like them. They go through life without leaving a mark no more than excluding others and making others feel less".

Could it be???

d. IT'S WRITTEN

I think it's not only written, but a day like today 2 years ago.... he was destined, and I wasn't.

Anything can be fixed with a CUBA!!

Well almost anything, as it turns out, as some of my readers know: I have issues with my lil sis, and yesterday I casually had to pick her up at a partaaaay. So I went to get her, alongside with a good friend of mine, and suddenly we ended up going to another party, in which my sister socialized, and she finally speaks to me again!! Since she has been pissed at me for a month, and I never completley understood why! hahaha.


I spent a wonderful saturday, alongside with a couple of highschool friends, and some great Havanna Club and Jack Daniel's!! hahaha

Can you believe it?? All thanks to serving her a couple of drinks! hahahaha

PD Well I must get back to the red carpet, I loved the way Brad Pitt dodged Ryan Secrest- an annoying lil prick-. Cuz I'm like that! hahah Untile next time!!!