Thursday, January 29, 2009

Educational Crisis

Inspite current events, when everyone is talking about: economics, crisis, poverty, unemployment I can only think of my crisis the one college has begun to put me in a dilemma. I must be honest, I’m in desperate need of some input on the subject…

Here you see, the thing goes like so… I thought, in my bliss ignorance, that in college I would learn it all, everything I need to succeed and become what I want to, learn those little things, those details you need to know to work in this business. U

But the thing is, I let myself become convinced of that, I was stuck in my own fixated reality. And actually things aren’t what I thought, you see, I think that I’m not learning what I should be learning, and I’m actually going through the motions at school. Most of my teachers are Marxists’ that don’t see more than what they want to. Sooo after a tough ass exam I got in, and I was happy as hell, though a bit unsure that I had made the right "career" choice... still wanting to become a lawyer

On Tuesday (2 weeks ago), speaking with my high school principal –a genius, I might add- a guy who can rationalize and make my college teachers look like ignorant wimps with false arguments. You see talking to him, I realized that I learn more talking to a guy like him, than talking to 99.9999% of the teachers I’ve had classes with – with the exception of Tenorio of course-.

This dilemma, started off on Tuesday, reading a whole lot of things on the Obama Campaign, I almost had a heart attack, when I saw that Jon Favreau -the guy who wrote Obama’s speeches- is only 27 years old, and of course his P.A is only 24. Daaang…. That’s do a whole lot, in a young age! Imagine that, a 24 year old, with the prez’s agenda!!! Why can’t people have that kind of opportunities in this country “in development”.

Is it worth it to be almost 5 years studying this, when I’m clearly seeing that I’m not learning enough? I mean, hell, don’t think I’m slaking off… I’m doing a whole lot by myself, besides reading actually good books. But should I stay or should I go? Is the paper that worth it. I thought that going into my option I would be happy, and it's be a terrible week, things are officially worse than ever!! What to do?? Should I just go through with it?? Should I stay or should I go? I want to specialize on political marketing, media training, and crisis.... and I'm sure as hell not getting any of that with all the Marxists theoreicals my college makes me lear and bullshit around!!

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

The stoooory of my life!!

I felt inspired with this song, call it projection.... or whatever........

Sweetness, sweetness never suits me, when I get up to take you home
Maybe it's love, love at first slightly drunk
Now I'm walking with the sun in my mouth

Worry, worry is a well, going to let it fall tonight, from where we stand

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
I can see what's coming, but I'm not saying it

Sickness, weakness at the thought, of how you're going to play
How long should I stay?
Promises, promises never cease to assist it, now I'm back on my back
Please bite your words
Hurry, hurry to believe, I can always trust, as much as you deceive

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
I can see what's coming, but I'm not saying it

What's your middle name? How do you play the game?
I'll be the first to leave
When did I grow up? I don't want to say too much
I'll be the first to leave

What can't be decided
In the morning it will bring itself to you
What can't be decided
Can fool you into thinking maybe you can choose

I can see what's coming
But I'm not saying it

Stars- Midnight Coward.....because after all we've been through... you are just another coward!!!

Monday, January 26, 2009

Goood ol' Ferras...

The less we have to lose the less we care! Fear those whom have nothing to lose in this life!!

That’s the leason which the “good old ‘Ferras’” made me learn. Who is he? What did he do? The story is quite Mexican, although… I will try to translate the good juicy details…

Here’s the scene, so you can feel the ambient: A guy is standing in the line up –the one where the cops take pictures- Like so…. - Yes, just like the d12 poster-.


A "sly" reporter -like most of the reporters in this land- hahaha- goes up to Ferras… and he immediately starts of telling “his facts”, throught a story with no chronological order o sense - in that matter-.

“My name is Felipe Ferras Goméz, sir. I’m from Veracruz. The dude came up to me with a chain and 500 pesos. He told me “I don’t give a fuck what you do, to me your just a shitface”. I told my mother “I’m going to stab that motherfucker”. My mother said “Nooo Ferraz don’t beee maaad, calm down”. Ugh, my damn knees hurt like crazy.

The reporter asks : Did you kill him?

Ferras: Afirmative.

Reporter: What happened?

Ferras: We went to the train tracks, and there he tried to stab me… I avoided them “saa saaa saaa”. The mother fucker… got pissed, but started running. That’s when everything went to hell, and then I threw cold bullets. You know cold bullets. He screamed… “Ferras, stop”. Hell no, you drink it or you spill it!!

Reporter: Where did you meet him?

Ferras: Pancho Viejo, Vercruz The mo fo, was arrested in Veracruz.

Reporter: Why were you arrested?

Ferras: We worked together. The files are there, you can check the computer… Ok, umm domicile robbery. I already paid that. Now all I owe is for him. He said he was going to fornicate with my sister and my mother! When I started shooting he was all up like “nooo stop, I’m sorry”. I can’t deny it… I did it… he’s going to say I did it "ohh he stabbed me” I don’t regret it, damn fag! I did it I’ll pay… I don’t have anywhere to go. I’m 24, Ill be out in 30, I’ll be 54, no problem I’ll pay!! He can’t talk about my mother. My name Is Ferrras. I send a shout out, to Jannet Guadalupe Contreras, alias la mimosa. Who works in a radio station, in Radio Rolas.

END OF STORY

Damn I feel kind of bad for the guy’s lawyer. He was probably screaming: “Shut up”. “Don’t say a single thing”. Ferras is the clear example, that cynicism exists sometimes far more than we would like it to.
Hell, I love cynicism, I'm one of the biggest cynics I know -haha- But hey, there's a limit between saying what you feel like because you know that nothing can come of it, and saying things... that do have consequences -more than just pissing someone off-.such as loosing your freedom. Most of the things we do, we do them because we can, and we feel like doing them. Therefor, this guy should have kept his mouth shut, and hell, he could've argued "self-defense-.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

One of many things I believe....


I believe, one of many things in this life: the best things in life, are the ones which... we don't reason upon. We just act on them with out thinking. Hey, don't get me wrong I don't think we are irrational creatures which live upon their feelings. But I do think that it is the reason, that sometimes drives us over the edge. In the end, what I'm saying is that the best moments in life, are the ones which we don't plan, they are the ones that just come out of spontaneity.

For example; in a simple shallow kind of way (my way)... the best parties in life AREN'T PLANNED! I can't help mentioning thaaaa parties, it's just my thing.

But looking at it in a deeper spectrum... those people whom we love, passionated, we don't reason it. For example I could have a long list of demands for a "perfect guy", but in the long run... I end up with the least "list filling" kind of guy. Why?? Because my list is rational... I know why I want a kind of guy that.... 1... 2....3....4... BUT in the end of the road, maybe that guy won't make me feel more than "a simple feeling", and a simple feeling is easy to come by!! And human beeings throught life, don't search for simple feelings; we search for that feeling we can't understand, the feeling that confuses us, the feeling which we can't understand, much less explain.

This is the reason why movies, tv shows, books, and all the rest of the media contains... exist. They produce feelings more than thoughts... you feel something about the character, the news, and then you may rationalize upon it. Or al least, that's my belief!! We search for the feelings that certain things produce. WE ARE IN CONSTANT SEARCH OF EMOTIONS and FEELINGS!!!

I must remind you all, that I always speak for my self.... and for my self ONLY... I would not change any moment that I didn't think...in spite of the consequences -good or bad-. Why??? because... some emotions are worth living for!!! The adrenaline, fear, hatred, incompetence, love, regret. It is more through emotions how we learn. We don't want to feel something again or maybe we do!! hahah... who knows!!

I believe that it is those people who rationalize every movement... who have everything planned out, are the ones who in the end, become most frustrated... because... THINGS DON'T ALWAYS TURN OUT AS THEY SHOULD, or at least, the way some people plan things. There's nothing more unfair than the ways of the world.

I procrastinate way too much, I hate thinking.... that's why weed doesn't go with me!! hahaha


Monday, January 19, 2009

ROCKANDROLLA- movie


A long time ago when I had my 2MB connexion I downloaded a ton of movies.... one of them was ROCKANDROLLA, yeah you know that Guy Richie flick. I must admit I didn't really like Snatch that much, and I'm not fond of Guy, but I enjoyed this movie. It has a great scenry, good actors, a wonderful script... but above everything else, it's got some ass kicking phrases, or as I like to call them, LIFE MOTTOS! haha


The intro, after the credits there's the phrase:
"People ask the question... what's a RocknRolla? And I tell 'em - it's not about drugs, drums, and hospital drips, oh no. There's more there than that, my friend. We all like a bit of the good life - some the money, some the drugs, other the sex game, the glamour, or the fame. But a RocknRolla, oh, he's different. Why? Because a real RocknRolla wants the fucking lot".


Ok the other scene I loved, and not because of the mottos, but because of the direction.... would be the dance scene with Gerard Butler & Thandie Newton. The song which goes perfectly is by Flash & The Plan, and it's called: Waiting for a train.

And last but not least, and for that reason no less importaint; is my favorite part of the whole movie. Why? The answer is quite simple, because one day, I hope not very far away I wish I get the chance to slap someone silly, with a good old fashioned Archie Slap:




hahaha: "There's no need for strong violence".

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Wierd couple of days

OK Go!!
These have been a couple of interesting days, up until today. As it turns out I got offered a job… yes… another job.
On Monday I went to the interview and everything, I could have gotten it, but I refused it.

It would have been quite complicated to fit everything in, 2 jobs, school, and partaaays. As I have previously have repeated “I like my comfortable life”. And as my father put it “it’s a big sacrifice, is it worth it? Is it necessary?” Turns out he’s right –something that he hasn’t been for a long time-. Besides, the job had nothing to do with my major.

Even though I bitch a lot about my job at college, I actually enjoy it there, the perks are great, it’s simple, clean cut, and the commodities are good too. –This is how I convince myself-.

On Monday I also went to see a friend, who used to work in county. He asked me to help him pimp out a magazine that he’s sort of running. So I got to thinking, and got the “gang” together on Tuesday – Fer, Cora and Mimmie-, so we started brainstorming, and we will make this zine ours biatches!! It’s a good way to start a year don’t cha think?

Ughh, on the other hand I don't get men. The story of my life: there's this guy and we really hit it off, but no one acts upon their feelings DAMN IT!!!

PD. Yeaah I’m quite exited, because in exactly 6 days Obama will become president. He will sit in his desk in the oval office with his feet placed upon it; and say “Daaamn, I’m one smart negro. Ohhh Now I see how Monica got under the desk, it’s quite spacious.”

The American Dream, thanks to bad advice


Saturday, January 3, 2009

A long year in deed!!

2008.... was a year full of a lot of things.... new findings, resignations, fun, a little bit of everything. As I rang in 09 with some cuba libres ,Osvaldinho, his family and my sister I realized I wasted some of my time in things that I shouldn't have, or that weren't worthwhile. Therefore, I'm not going to make a new years resolution about "quitting smoking, loosing weight, stop procrastinating", I'm going to make one that will help me a whole lot more in the future.

My new year resolution will consist of not wasting my time, I will be a whole lot productive; there's nothing worse than throwing away my time, and life for that matter. I learned right up till the end that I had abandoned good people, people who are worth it, and I had focused my attention to a certain person that will never be, a person not willing to make a choice, therefore I made it for him.


I'm going to do all the things that I should have done2 years ago. And that's about it folks. I wish that everyone has a wonderful 09, I wish that the best of 08 is the worse of 08 (just like a good friend told me on new years eve).

This starts now..... c-ya!!!